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For recreational use only.
Optional CDW at $23.00 a day or less (shown for guidance only due to fluctuating exchange rates; accurate as of 03/02/01) is available in Europe.
New Grand Unified Theory Disclaimer: The manufacturer may technically be entitled to claim that this product is ten dimensional. However, the consumer is reminded that this confers no legal rights above and beyond those applicable to three-dimensional objects, since the seven new dimensions are "rolled up" into such a small "area" that they cannot be detected.
Do not stamp.
Keep this and all software out of the reach of children.
Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
We have sent the forms which seem right for you.
Warning.
Unpredictable results will occur if allowed to pass beyond the event horizon.
One size fits all.
No COD's.
Not available in stores, call now, operators are standing by.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse: Omniscience is mandatory in all cases before the court.
Not a safe alternative to smoking cigarettes.
Any use of this product, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe; although no liability is implied herein, the consumer is warned that this process will ultimately lead to the heat death of the Universe.
Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop.
The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a "gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power can therefore not be permanently guaranteed.
Driver carries less than $20 worth of ammunition.
This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe, including the products of other manufacturers, with a force proportional to the product of the masses and inversely proportional to the distance between them.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of Major League Foosball.
May cause drowsiness.
For external use only.
Nytol may cause drowsiness.
Prerecorded for this time zone.
Call toll free number before digging.
Keep cool; process promptly.
Handle With Extreme Care.
Please Note.
Remember to not forget.
For weekend rate, page must be accessed after noon Thursday and returned by noon Monday or higher daily rates apply.
This product warps space and time in its vicinity.
Edited for television.
Sign here without admitting guilt.
Call toll free before digging.
Proof of purchase required.
Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only.
Batteries not included.
Place stamp here.
Reproduction strictly prohibited.
Read label before using.
Attention.
Do not disturb.
A 24-hour advance reservation is required.
Not the Beatles.
Do not remove label under penalty of law.
Price does not include taxes.
May cause allergic skin reaction.
No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.
No user-serviceable parts inside.
Thanks to the San Antonio Astronomical Association.
Advisory.
Use at your own risk.
Booths for two or more.
Original proof of purchase must be returned when applying for a refund.
Not responsible for acts of God.
Do not drive car or operate machinery immediately after using Boots Children's Cough Medicine.
Violators will be towed at owner's expense. See owner for reimbursement form.
The entire physical universe, including this product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that universe cannot be guaranteed.
Subject to availability.
Product will be hot after heating.
Contains substances known by the State of California to cause cancer or birth defects.
Replace with same type.
This Web site is intended for the use of the individual members and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs.
This product is meant for educational purposes only.
Special usage rates are also available at select locations.
Not for use with aluminum utensils or cookware.
Public Notice as required by law.
This conversation may be recorded for training or quality purposes, or just because we feel like we can get away with it.
Colors may, in time, fade.
If condition persists, consult your physician.
Not insured by the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation.
Disabling security features will increase the chance of data theft or corruption.
Not recommended for people over the age of 143.
Not recommended for children.
Shower cap fits one head.
Some assembly required.
Consumer Notice.
Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.
Do not iron clothes on body.
Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
Void where prohibited.
Do not write below this line.
Not responsible for typographical errors.
As seen on TV.
Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
Avoid contact with skin.
Drop in any mailbox.
Some information may be stored in systems not in your country.
Useful results can only be obtained in an inertial frame of reference.
Apply only to affected area.
Kilroy was here.
Availability is limited.
Sales tax not included.
For off-road use only.
Use only pencil or blue or black ball point pen.
No purchase necessary.
Subject to CAB approval.
Not to be used in nuclear reactor control systems.
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Use inconsistent with package labeling may be a violation of Federal law.
Unless the word inspletularity has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored.
This is not an offer to sell securities.
Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.
Misuse may cause personal injury or death.
List each check separately by bank number.
Taxes, airport service charges in Europe, fuel, additional mailbox fee, drop charges and other optional items are extra.
Do not fold, bend, staple or mutilate.
Not responsible for user stupidity.
What goes up, must come down.
Management assumes no liability for unattended items.
Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of at least 99.9999999999% empty space.
Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T.
Proof of airline or Amtrak arrival is required at ISP counter or higher rates apply.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward.
Warranty period limited.
Must be over 17.
Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
Do not attempt to stop chainsaw chain with your hands.
Do not use hair dryer in the shower.
Read the entire test before answering any questions.
Do not insert backwards.
Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
Sanitized for your protection.
Times are approximate.
The buyer assumes all risks associated with using this product.
Post office will not deliver without postage.
Keep away from small children.
Postage will be paid by addressee.
Do not use hair dryer while sleeping.
Shipping and handling extra.
Not available in all states.
Check here if tax deductible.
Parental guidance suggested.
Protected by Smith and Wesson.
Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform.
Always wear safety goggles.
Never forget 4/20.
Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the consumer is not directly observing this product, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
Not affiliated with the American Red Cross.
List at least two alternate dates.
Decision of judges is final.
Shading within a garment may occur.
Hearing protection may be required.
Thanks to the US Naval Observatory.
List was current at time of printing.
For office use only.
Failure to respond in a timely manner may result in imposition of additional penalties.
Do not dispose of in fire.
No Canadian coins.
No animals were harmed during the creation of this Web site.
This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or any other mammal, those who have a penchant for time wasting, illiterates and lawyers.
Restaurant package, not for resale.
Avoid alcoholic beverages while using this software.
Optional CDW at $14.99 a day or less is available in the U.S.
Package sold by weight, not volume.
Use with adequate ventilation.
Driver does not carry cash.
Add toner.
Not suitable for use at relativistic speeds.
May cause excitability.
Store in original containers.
Close cover before striking.
Not to be used for the other use.
In case of irritation, flush eyes with cold water and consult your physician.
Subject to change without notice.
Contents may settle during shipment.
Keep marks inside boxes. Be sure you have marked correctly.
Employees and their families are not eligible.
Weekly rates require a 5-day minimum rental or daily rates apply.
Your mileage may vary.
Repeating unconfirmed rumors may have adverse consequences.
Bonded items should not be placed in oven, microwave or dishwasher.
Simulated picture.
At participating locations only.
Video cameras in use.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
Helium balloons may explode when elevated to extreme heights.
Do not fold, spindle or mutilate.
Insure all protective guards are in place before operating machinery.
The mass of this product contains the energy equivalent of 85 million tons of TNT per net ounce of weight.
Remove baby before folding stroller.
For indoor or outdoor use only.
No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop.
Some restrictions apply.
This product contains minute electrically charged particles moving at velocities in excess of five hundred million miles per hour.
Caution.
Record additional transactions on back of previous stub.
Beware of dog.
Consult your physician before using this program.
For use only in the intended use.
Not to be removed under penalty of law.
Use other side for additional listings.
Keep away from fire or flame.
Details inside.
Health Warning: Care should be taken when lifting this product, since its mass, and thus its weight, is dependent on its velocity relative to the user.
Contents under pressure; do not puncture or incinerate.
Important Notice to Purchasers.
Some equipment shown is optional.
No alcohol, dogs or horses.
Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
Store it in a cool, dry place.
Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," it is impossible for the consumer to find out at the same time both precisely where this product is and how fast it is moving.
May be too intense for some viewers.
No solicitors.
Component Equivalency Notice: The subatomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect as those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.
If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
Screens must remain in place to ensure bug free operation.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of the National Foosball League.
Penalty for private use.
All models over 18 years of age.
Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery.
Falling rock.
If symptoms persist, consult your physician.
Use only in a well-ventilated area.
Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Do not carry loose batteries in pockets, purses or bags.
According to certain suggested versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the primary particles constituting this product may decay to nothingness within the next four hundred million years.
Slippery when wet.
Many suitcases look alike.
Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.
Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant or are nursing are advised to consult their husband and physician before reading this website.
This notice supersedes all previous notices.
Avoid repeated or prolonged contact with skin.
No other warranty expressed or implied.
At some off-airport locations, an airport-imposed tax or fee, ranging up to 10% will apply if you choose to exit on our shuttle bus.
No trees were killed in the creation of this message. However, many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
Rates higher for users under age 25.
No resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended.
Eating before reading may result in unhealthy indigestion.
Use only as directed.
Subject to local regulation.
This is a 100% matter product: In the unlikely event that this merchandise should contact antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion will result.
Approved for veterans.
Cat napping.
Not safe for children and pets.
Harmful if swallowed.
Read all instructions before starting assembly.
Be sure each item is properly endorsed.
The above limitations may not apply to you.
You must be present to win.
First pull up, then pull down.
Full license agreement is included within.
No passes accepted for this engagement.
Safe for children and pets.
You could be a winner!
Prices subject to change without notice.
Thanks to the Tech Model Railroad Club.
This abridged version does not contain all of the information present in the full text.
There is an extremely small but nonzero chance that, through a process know as "tunneling," this product may spontaneously disappear from its present location and reappear at any random place in the universe, including your neighbor's domicile. The manufacturer will not be responsible for any damages or inconvenience that may result.
See label for sequence.
No anchovies unless otherwise specified.
Read this before opening package.
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