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For external use only.
Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Slippery when wet.
Hearing protection may be required.
Proof of purchase required.
Close cover before striking.
No COD's.
The buyer assumes all risks associated with using this product.
Not a safe alternative to smoking cigarettes.
Some restrictions apply.
At some off-airport locations, an airport-imposed tax or fee, ranging up to 10% will apply if you choose to exit on our shuttle bus.
If symptoms persist, consult your physician.
For indoor or outdoor use only.
Helium balloons may explode when elevated to extreme heights.
Misuse may cause personal injury or death.
Do not stamp.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of Major League Foosball.
May cause allergic skin reaction.
Do not use hair dryer while sleeping.
Falling rock.
This abridged version does not contain all of the information present in the full text.
All models over 18 years of age.
Health Warning: Care should be taken when lifting this product, since its mass, and thus its weight, is dependent on its velocity relative to the user.
Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," it is impossible for the consumer to find out at the same time both precisely where this product is and how fast it is moving.
Batteries not included.
This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe, including the products of other manufacturers, with a force proportional to the product of the masses and inversely proportional to the distance between them.
Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T.
Not responsible for user stupidity.
Store in original containers.
Management assumes no liability for unattended items.
No solicitors.
Avoid alcoholic beverages while using this software.
List was current at time of printing.
Do not write below this line.
List each check separately by bank number.
Approved for veterans.
Keep marks inside boxes. Be sure you have marked correctly.
The above limitations may not apply to you.
This product warps space and time in its vicinity.
There is an extremely small but nonzero chance that, through a process know as "tunneling," this product may spontaneously disappear from its present location and reappear at any random place in the universe, including your neighbor's domicile. The manufacturer will not be responsible for any damages or inconvenience that may result.
Prerecorded for this time zone.
Use only in a well-ventilated area.
Do not carry loose batteries in pockets, purses or bags.
This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or any other mammal, those who have a penchant for time wasting, illiterates and lawyers.
Eating before reading may result in unhealthy indigestion.
Place stamp here.
Colors may, in time, fade.
Special usage rates are also available at select locations.
Add toner.
Keep away from small children.
Avoid repeated or prolonged contact with skin.
This conversation may be recorded for training or quality purposes, or just because we feel like we can get away with it.
List at least two alternate dates.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Video cameras in use.
No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.
Driver does not carry cash.
Thanks to the US Naval Observatory.
Warning.
Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
Driver carries less than $20 worth of ammunition.
No other warranty expressed or implied.
Call toll free before digging.
Price does not include taxes.
Read all instructions before starting assembly.
Not affiliated with the American Red Cross.
Read label before using.
A 24-hour advance reservation is required.
Handle With Extreme Care.
Not to be removed under penalty of law.
The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a "gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power can therefore not be permanently guaranteed.
Useful results can only be obtained in an inertial frame of reference.
No user-serviceable parts inside.
At participating locations only.
Subject to availability.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward.
Product will be hot after heating.
Use only pencil or blue or black ball point pen.
Not recommended for people over the age of 143.
Protected by Smith and Wesson.
For office use only.
Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
Not responsible for acts of God.
Proof of airline or Amtrak arrival is required at ISP counter or higher rates apply.
Use other side for additional listings.
No Canadian coins.
Bonded items should not be placed in oven, microwave or dishwasher.
Details inside.
Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
Apply only to affected area.
Do not fold, bend, staple or mutilate.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of the National Foosball League.
No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop.
For use only in the intended use.
Contents under pressure; do not puncture or incinerate.
Component Equivalency Notice: The subatomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect as those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.
Shower cap fits one head.
Subject to CAB approval.
Consumer Notice.
As seen on TV.
Keep away from fire or flame.
Weekly rates require a 5-day minimum rental or daily rates apply.
Violators will be towed at owner's expense. See owner for reimbursement form.
Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only.
According to certain suggested versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the primary particles constituting this product may decay to nothingness within the next four hundred million years.
Shipping and handling extra.
Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform.
Rates higher for users under age 25.
Repeating unconfirmed rumors may have adverse consequences.
Your mileage may vary.
Harmful if swallowed.
Use with adequate ventilation.
One size fits all.
Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the consumer is not directly observing this product, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
Package sold by weight, not volume.
Not available in stores, call now, operators are standing by.
Edited for television.
Read this before opening package.
Read the entire test before answering any questions.
Not the Beatles.
Reproduction strictly prohibited.
The entire physical universe, including this product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that universe cannot be guaranteed.
Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.
Decision of judges is final.
Contains substances known by the State of California to cause cancer or birth defects.
Do not remove label under penalty of law.
First pull up, then pull down.
This is not an offer to sell securities.
Always wear safety goggles.
Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery.
This Web site is intended for the use of the individual members and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs.
Keep cool; process promptly.
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Taxes, airport service charges in Europe, fuel, additional mailbox fee, drop charges and other optional items are extra.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
Insure all protective guards are in place before operating machinery.
Parental guidance suggested.
Prices subject to change without notice.
What goes up, must come down.
For off-road use only.
Post office will not deliver without postage.
Failure to respond in a timely manner may result in imposition of additional penalties.
Do not use hair dryer in the shower.
Do not disturb.
Be sure each item is properly endorsed.
Store it in a cool, dry place.
Replace with same type.
Important Notice to Purchasers.
No trees were killed in the creation of this message. However, many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
Kilroy was here.
The mass of this product contains the energy equivalent of 85 million tons of TNT per net ounce of weight.
Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of at least 99.9999999999% empty space.
Do not dispose of in fire.
Use at your own risk.
If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse: Omniscience is mandatory in all cases before the court.
Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.
Nytol may cause drowsiness.
Disabling security features will increase the chance of data theft or corruption.
Do not attempt to stop chainsaw chain with your hands.
Times are approximate.
Attention.
Not safe for children and pets.
Employees and their families are not eligible.
This product contains minute electrically charged particles moving at velocities in excess of five hundred million miles per hour.
Public Notice as required by law.
Optional CDW at $23.00 a day or less (shown for guidance only due to fluctuating exchange rates; accurate as of 03/02/01) is available in Europe.
Not available in all states.
For weekend rate, page must be accessed after noon Thursday and returned by noon Monday or higher daily rates apply.
Not to be used in nuclear reactor control systems.
Shading within a garment may occur.
This is a 100% matter product: In the unlikely event that this merchandise should contact antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion will result.
Some assembly required.
Use inconsistent with package labeling may be a violation of Federal law.
Availability is limited.
Subject to change without notice.
Sales tax not included.
Safe for children and pets.
Caution.
Do not fold, spindle or mutilate.
Advisory.
We have sent the forms which seem right for you.
May be too intense for some viewers.
Do not iron clothes on body.
This product is meant for educational purposes only.
Penalty for private use.
Not for use with aluminum utensils or cookware.
You must be present to win.
Check here if tax deductible.
Postage will be paid by addressee.
Do not drive car or operate machinery immediately after using Boots Children's Cough Medicine.
Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant or are nursing are advised to consult their husband and physician before reading this website.
Record additional transactions on back of previous stub.
Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
Drop in any mailbox.
Not recommended for children.
If condition persists, consult your physician.
Sign here without admitting guilt.
Unpredictable results will occur if allowed to pass beyond the event horizon.
No purchase necessary.
Full license agreement is included within.
Remember to not forget.
May cause excitability.
Warranty period limited.
Not to be used for the other use.
Must be over 17.
Some equipment shown is optional.
For recreational use only.
Any use of this product, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe; although no liability is implied herein, the consumer is warned that this process will ultimately lead to the heat death of the Universe.
Thanks to the Tech Model Railroad Club.
No anchovies unless otherwise specified.
Beware of dog.
Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
Restaurant package, not for resale.
Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.
Screens must remain in place to ensure bug free operation.
Keep this and all software out of the reach of children.
Remove baby before folding stroller.
See label for sequence.
New Grand Unified Theory Disclaimer: The manufacturer may technically be entitled to claim that this product is ten dimensional. However, the consumer is reminded that this confers no legal rights above and beyond those applicable to three-dimensional objects, since the seven new dimensions are "rolled up" into such a small "area" that they cannot be detected.
Many suitcases look alike.
Thanks to the San Antonio Astronomical Association.
Never forget 4/20.
Unless the word inspletularity has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored.
Not insured by the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation.
Not responsible for typographical errors.
No alcohol, dogs or horses.
Sanitized for your protection.
Contents may settle during shipment.
In case of irritation, flush eyes with cold water and consult your physician.
Call toll free number before digging.
Not suitable for use at relativistic speeds.
Void where prohibited.
No resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended.
No passes accepted for this engagement.
Original proof of purchase must be returned when applying for a refund.
Subject to local regulation.
Cat napping.
Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
This notice supersedes all previous notices.
Avoid contact with skin.
Booths for two or more.
Use only as directed.
You could be a winner!
Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop.
Consult your physician before using this program.
Please Note.
Some information may be stored in systems not in your country.
Optional CDW at $14.99 a day or less is available in the U.S.
May cause drowsiness.
Do not insert backwards.
Simulated picture.
No animals were harmed during the creation of this Web site.
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