|
Important Notice to Purchasers.
Remember to not forget.
The buyer assumes all risks associated with using this product.
Subject to local regulation.
Void where prohibited.
Keep cool; process promptly.
Beware of dog.
May cause drowsiness.
Read the entire test before answering any questions.
Full license agreement is included within.
Handle With Extreme Care.
List each check separately by bank number.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Violators will be towed at owner's expense. See owner for reimbursement form.
According to certain suggested versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the primary particles constituting this product may decay to nothingness within the next four hundred million years.
Thanks to the San Antonio Astronomical Association.
Subject to CAB approval.
No user-serviceable parts inside.
Parental guidance suggested.
Your mileage may vary.
Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.
Unpredictable results will occur if allowed to pass beyond the event horizon.
Call toll free number before digging.
This product warps space and time in its vicinity.
Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.
Colors may, in time, fade.
Employees and their families are not eligible.
Do not drive car or operate machinery immediately after using Boots Children's Cough Medicine.
At participating locations only.
Repeating unconfirmed rumors may have adverse consequences.
This conversation may be recorded for training or quality purposes, or just because we feel like we can get away with it.
Management assumes no liability for unattended items.
List at least two alternate dates.
Reproduction strictly prohibited.
Do not insert backwards.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse: Omniscience is mandatory in all cases before the court.
Batteries not included.
For use only in the intended use.
Simulated picture.
Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
Optional CDW at $23.00 a day or less (shown for guidance only due to fluctuating exchange rates; accurate as of 03/02/01) is available in Europe.
Avoid alcoholic beverages while using this software.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
You could be a winner!
Always wear safety goggles.
Details inside.
Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
Thanks to the US Naval Observatory.
Price does not include taxes.
No anchovies unless otherwise specified.
The above limitations may not apply to you.
Some information may be stored in systems not in your country.
Insure all protective guards are in place before operating machinery.
Use only in a well-ventilated area.
Protected by Smith and Wesson.
No COD's.
Availability is limited.
Use inconsistent with package labeling may be a violation of Federal law.
Please Note.
Check here if tax deductible.
Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop.
Not available in all states.
Not a safe alternative to smoking cigarettes.
Advisory.
Do not remove label under penalty of law.
Record additional transactions on back of previous stub.
Keep away from fire or flame.
For off-road use only.
What goes up, must come down.
Close cover before striking.
Approved for veterans.
Nytol may cause drowsiness.
Do not disturb.
Do not fold, spindle or mutilate.
Not to be used for the other use.
Do not stamp.
In case of irritation, flush eyes with cold water and consult your physician.
May cause excitability.
Any use of this product, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe; although no liability is implied herein, the consumer is warned that this process will ultimately lead to the heat death of the Universe.
Warranty period limited.
Store it in a cool, dry place.
This abridged version does not contain all of the information present in the full text.
Shipping and handling extra.
Disabling security features will increase the chance of data theft or corruption.
Some restrictions apply.
No Canadian coins.
Original proof of purchase must be returned when applying for a refund.
This is a 100% matter product: In the unlikely event that this merchandise should contact antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion will result.
Keep this and all software out of the reach of children.
Drop in any mailbox.
Warning.
Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant or are nursing are advised to consult their husband and physician before reading this website.
Restaurant package, not for resale.
No resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended.
Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Times are approximate.
Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of at least 99.9999999999% empty space.
Keep away from small children.
Do not use hair dryer while sleeping.
Contents may settle during shipment.
No solicitors.
Edited for television.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward.
Post office will not deliver without postage.
Never forget 4/20.
Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
Store in original containers.
Sanitized for your protection.
Proof of purchase required.
Thanks to the Tech Model Railroad Club.
Read label before using.
Not affiliated with the American Red Cross.
Read all instructions before starting assembly.
No passes accepted for this engagement.
Penalty for private use.
Not for use with aluminum utensils or cookware.
This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe, including the products of other manufacturers, with a force proportional to the product of the masses and inversely proportional to the distance between them.
Do not write below this line.
If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
Driver carries less than $20 worth of ammunition.
No other warranty expressed or implied.
Hearing protection may be required.
Do not iron clothes on body.
Contents under pressure; do not puncture or incinerate.
Some equipment shown is optional.
Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.
Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," it is impossible for the consumer to find out at the same time both precisely where this product is and how fast it is moving.
Use at your own risk.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of Major League Foosball.
For weekend rate, page must be accessed after noon Thursday and returned by noon Monday or higher daily rates apply.
Avoid contact with skin.
Add toner.
Not responsible for typographical errors.
Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the consumer is not directly observing this product, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
Prices subject to change without notice.
Unless the word inspletularity has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored.
Bonded items should not be placed in oven, microwave or dishwasher.
No purchase necessary.
Product will be hot after heating.
Shower cap fits one head.
For recreational use only.
Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery.
Failure to respond in a timely manner may result in imposition of additional penalties.
We have sent the forms which seem right for you.
Subject to availability.
This is not an offer to sell securities.
Not available in stores, call now, operators are standing by.
Public Notice as required by law.
Booths for two or more.
The entire physical universe, including this product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that universe cannot be guaranteed.
This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or any other mammal, those who have a penchant for time wasting, illiterates and lawyers.
Not responsible for user stupidity.
Contains substances known by the State of California to cause cancer or birth defects.
Component Equivalency Notice: The subatomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect as those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.
Remove baby before folding stroller.
Use only as directed.
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Some assembly required.
There is an extremely small but nonzero chance that, through a process know as "tunneling," this product may spontaneously disappear from its present location and reappear at any random place in the universe, including your neighbor's domicile. The manufacturer will not be responsible for any damages or inconvenience that may result.
This notice supersedes all previous notices.
Avoid repeated or prolonged contact with skin.
Use only pencil or blue or black ball point pen.
This product is meant for educational purposes only.
Not the Beatles.
Rates higher for users under age 25.
Not recommended for people over the age of 143.
No trees were killed in the creation of this message. However, many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
Sign here without admitting guilt.
Weekly rates require a 5-day minimum rental or daily rates apply.
Decision of judges is final.
Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform.
First pull up, then pull down.
No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop.
Screens must remain in place to ensure bug free operation.
Eating before reading may result in unhealthy indigestion.
Health Warning: Care should be taken when lifting this product, since its mass, and thus its weight, is dependent on its velocity relative to the user.
Optional CDW at $14.99 a day or less is available in the U.S.
Read this before opening package.
You must be present to win.
Proof of airline or Amtrak arrival is required at ISP counter or higher rates apply.
Not recommended for children.
The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a "gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power can therefore not be permanently guaranteed.
Falling rock.
Postage will be paid by addressee.
All models over 18 years of age.
Use with adequate ventilation.
Not to be removed under penalty of law.
If condition persists, consult your physician.
Safe for children and pets.
New Grand Unified Theory Disclaimer: The manufacturer may technically be entitled to claim that this product is ten dimensional. However, the consumer is reminded that this confers no legal rights above and beyond those applicable to three-dimensional objects, since the seven new dimensions are "rolled up" into such a small "area" that they cannot be detected.
Do not use hair dryer in the shower.
Special usage rates are also available at select locations.
May be too intense for some viewers.
Caution.
Many suitcases look alike.
Consumer Notice.
Prerecorded for this time zone.
Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T.
Use other side for additional listings.
One size fits all.
Attention.
No animals were harmed during the creation of this Web site.
This Web site is intended for the use of the individual members and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs.
Not safe for children and pets.
For indoor or outdoor use only.
Do not attempt to stop chainsaw chain with your hands.
The mass of this product contains the energy equivalent of 85 million tons of TNT per net ounce of weight.
Useful results can only be obtained in an inertial frame of reference.
Subject to change without notice.
Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of the National Foosball League.
List was current at time of printing.
Replace with same type.
This product contains minute electrically charged particles moving at velocities in excess of five hundred million miles per hour.
Cat napping.
Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
Slippery when wet.
Package sold by weight, not volume.
Call toll free before digging.
Not insured by the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation.
For external use only.
If symptoms persist, consult your physician.
May cause allergic skin reaction.
Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
Must be over 17.
Video cameras in use.
Shading within a garment may occur.
Do not dispose of in fire.
Sales tax not included.
See label for sequence.
A 24-hour advance reservation is required.
Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
Harmful if swallowed.
Taxes, airport service charges in Europe, fuel, additional mailbox fee, drop charges and other optional items are extra.
Kilroy was here.
Not responsible for acts of God.
At some off-airport locations, an airport-imposed tax or fee, ranging up to 10% will apply if you choose to exit on our shuttle bus.
Helium balloons may explode when elevated to extreme heights.
No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.
As seen on TV.
Driver does not carry cash.
For office use only.
Misuse may cause personal injury or death.
Consult your physician before using this program.
Do not fold, bend, staple or mutilate.
Not to be used in nuclear reactor control systems.
Apply only to affected area.
Keep marks inside boxes. Be sure you have marked correctly.
Not suitable for use at relativistic speeds.
Do not carry loose batteries in pockets, purses or bags.
Be sure each item is properly endorsed.
Place stamp here.
No alcohol, dogs or horses.
|
|
