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Not a safe alternative to smoking cigarettes.
Consumer Notice.
This conversation may be recorded for training or quality purposes, or just because we feel like we can get away with it.
Unpredictable results will occur if allowed to pass beyond the event horizon.
Use with adequate ventilation.
You must be present to win.
Be sure each item is properly endorsed.
No anchovies unless otherwise specified.
This product is meant for educational purposes only.
Thanks to the San Antonio Astronomical Association.
Full license agreement is included within.
Keep away from fire or flame.
Do not stamp.
Eating before reading may result in unhealthy indigestion.
This notice supersedes all previous notices.
No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.
Call toll free number before digging.
No passes accepted for this engagement.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform.
Penalty for private use.
Special usage rates are also available at select locations.
Some equipment shown is optional.
Postage will be paid by addressee.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse: Omniscience is mandatory in all cases before the court.
Not available in stores, call now, operators are standing by.
Use only pencil or blue or black ball point pen.
Sign here without admitting guilt.
Not affiliated with the American Red Cross.
Important Notice to Purchasers.
May cause drowsiness.
A 24-hour advance reservation is required.
No trees were killed in the creation of this message. However, many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
For indoor or outdoor use only.
Useful results can only be obtained in an inertial frame of reference.
Must be over 17.
Falling rock.
Your mileage may vary.
This is not an offer to sell securities.
Decision of judges is final.
Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
Do not carry loose batteries in pockets, purses or bags.
Not safe for children and pets.
Attention.
New Grand Unified Theory Disclaimer: The manufacturer may technically be entitled to claim that this product is ten dimensional. However, the consumer is reminded that this confers no legal rights above and beyond those applicable to three-dimensional objects, since the seven new dimensions are "rolled up" into such a small "area" that they cannot be detected.
May cause excitability.
Not responsible for user stupidity.
Not to be removed under penalty of law.
This product warps space and time in its vicinity.
Use at your own risk.
Avoid alcoholic beverages while using this software.
Not available in all states.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward.
Thanks to the US Naval Observatory.
Check here if tax deductible.
Avoid repeated or prolonged contact with skin.
If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
Availability is limited.
Taxes, airport service charges in Europe, fuel, additional mailbox fee, drop charges and other optional items are extra.
The entire physical universe, including this product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that universe cannot be guaranteed.
Management assumes no liability for unattended items.
Employees and their families are not eligible.
The mass of this product contains the energy equivalent of 85 million tons of TNT per net ounce of weight.
Times are approximate.
Not to be used in nuclear reactor control systems.
Simulated picture.
Helium balloons may explode when elevated to extreme heights.
Subject to change without notice.
Shipping and handling extra.
Do not insert backwards.
Add toner.
Please Note.
List was current at time of printing.
Not the Beatles.
Public Notice as required by law.
The buyer assumes all risks associated with using this product.
We have sent the forms which seem right for you.
Do not dispose of in fire.
Kilroy was here.
The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a "gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power can therefore not be permanently guaranteed.
Caution.
No other warranty expressed or implied.
If symptoms persist, consult your physician.
Subject to CAB approval.
For weekend rate, page must be accessed after noon Thursday and returned by noon Monday or higher daily rates apply.
No solicitors.
Use inconsistent with package labeling may be a violation of Federal law.
Rates higher for users under age 25.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of Major League Foosball.
Sanitized for your protection.
Not recommended for people over the age of 143.
Warranty period limited.
Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
Keep away from small children.
There is an extremely small but nonzero chance that, through a process know as "tunneling," this product may spontaneously disappear from its present location and reappear at any random place in the universe, including your neighbor's domicile. The manufacturer will not be responsible for any damages or inconvenience that may result.
Optional CDW at $14.99 a day or less is available in the U.S.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
Do not fold, bend, staple or mutilate.
List each check separately by bank number.
Video cameras in use.
May cause allergic skin reaction.
Many suitcases look alike.
Nytol may cause drowsiness.
Thanks to the Tech Model Railroad Club.
What goes up, must come down.
Do not fold, spindle or mutilate.
Remove baby before folding stroller.
Use other side for additional listings.
Keep this and all software out of the reach of children.
Cat napping.
Slippery when wet.
Not responsible for acts of God.
Package sold by weight, not volume.
Contains substances known by the State of California to cause cancer or birth defects.
If condition persists, consult your physician.
Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T.
Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
Failure to respond in a timely manner may result in imposition of additional penalties.
Parental guidance suggested.
Disabling security features will increase the chance of data theft or corruption.
At participating locations only.
Close cover before striking.
Contents under pressure; do not puncture or incinerate.
Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," it is impossible for the consumer to find out at the same time both precisely where this product is and how fast it is moving.
Not recommended for children.
Apply only to affected area.
Read label before using.
Record additional transactions on back of previous stub.
Driver does not carry cash.
Booths for two or more.
Proof of airline or Amtrak arrival is required at ISP counter or higher rates apply.
Repeating unconfirmed rumors may have adverse consequences.
Not responsible for typographical errors.
Do not use hair dryer in the shower.
One size fits all.
No user-serviceable parts inside.
May be too intense for some viewers.
For external use only.
No animals were harmed during the creation of this Web site.
The above limitations may not apply to you.
Keep marks inside boxes. Be sure you have marked correctly.
Driver carries less than $20 worth of ammunition.
Insure all protective guards are in place before operating machinery.
Advisory.
No alcohol, dogs or horses.
Some information may be stored in systems not in your country.
Violators will be towed at owner's expense. See owner for reimbursement form.
Beware of dog.
Bonded items should not be placed in oven, microwave or dishwasher.
Optional CDW at $23.00 a day or less (shown for guidance only due to fluctuating exchange rates; accurate as of 03/02/01) is available in Europe.
For office use only.
Contents may settle during shipment.
Replace with same type.
No resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended.
Do not write below this line.
Do not drive car or operate machinery immediately after using Boots Children's Cough Medicine.
Not to be used for the other use.
Use only as directed.
This Web site is intended for the use of the individual members and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs.
Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
All models over 18 years of age.
Place stamp here.
No purchase necessary.
Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop.
Shading within a garment may occur.
Approved for veterans.
Avoid contact with skin.
Do not disturb.
Harmful if swallowed.
Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
Any use of this product, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe; although no liability is implied herein, the consumer is warned that this process will ultimately lead to the heat death of the Universe.
Shower cap fits one head.
Some restrictions apply.
Never forget 4/20.
Some assembly required.
Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.
Do not use hair dryer while sleeping.
Safe for children and pets.
Health Warning: Care should be taken when lifting this product, since its mass, and thus its weight, is dependent on its velocity relative to the user.
Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
Edited for television.
Read all instructions before starting assembly.
Not for use with aluminum utensils or cookware.
Void where prohibited.
Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.
Sales tax not included.
Component Equivalency Notice: The subatomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect as those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.
Proof of purchase required.
Read the entire test before answering any questions.
According to certain suggested versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the primary particles constituting this product may decay to nothingness within the next four hundred million years.
Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery.
Remember to not forget.
Price does not include taxes.
This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe, including the products of other manufacturers, with a force proportional to the product of the masses and inversely proportional to the distance between them.
Do not iron clothes on body.
Handle With Extreme Care.
This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or any other mammal, those who have a penchant for time wasting, illiterates and lawyers.
For off-road use only.
Not suitable for use at relativistic speeds.
Do not attempt to stop chainsaw chain with your hands.
Subject to availability.
Post office will not deliver without postage.
Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant or are nursing are advised to consult their husband and physician before reading this website.
Prices subject to change without notice.
Weekly rates require a 5-day minimum rental or daily rates apply.
Screens must remain in place to ensure bug free operation.
Store it in a cool, dry place.
Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.
List at least two alternate dates.
Colors may, in time, fade.
No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop.
Reproduction strictly prohibited.
Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the consumer is not directly observing this product, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
Warning.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of the National Foosball League.
This abridged version does not contain all of the information present in the full text.
Product will be hot after heating.
Read this before opening package.
In case of irritation, flush eyes with cold water and consult your physician.
Do not remove label under penalty of law.
Restaurant package, not for resale.
Subject to local regulation.
Unless the word inspletularity has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored.
Details inside.
Original proof of purchase must be returned when applying for a refund.
As seen on TV.
No Canadian coins.
Keep cool; process promptly.
For recreational use only.
Always wear safety goggles.
Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only.
Call toll free before digging.
Not insured by the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation.
Protected by Smith and Wesson.
See label for sequence.
Misuse may cause personal injury or death.
First pull up, then pull down.
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
This is a 100% matter product: In the unlikely event that this merchandise should contact antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion will result.
This product contains minute electrically charged particles moving at velocities in excess of five hundred million miles per hour.
No COD's.
Batteries not included.
For use only in the intended use.
Drop in any mailbox.
At some off-airport locations, an airport-imposed tax or fee, ranging up to 10% will apply if you choose to exit on our shuttle bus.
Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of at least 99.9999999999% empty space.
Use only in a well-ventilated area.
Store in original containers.
Prerecorded for this time zone.
You could be a winner!
Consult your physician before using this program.
Hearing protection may be required.
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