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Sign here without admitting guilt.
List at least two alternate dates.
Violators will be towed at owner's expense. See owner for reimbursement form.
Attention.
Not recommended for children.
Your cancelled check is your receipt.
Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show.
Not to be removed under penalty of law.
Not insured by the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation.
May be too intense for some viewers.
Read label before using.
Prices subject to change without notice.
Always wear safety goggles.
Optional CDW at $23.00 a day or less (shown for guidance only due to fluctuating exchange rates; accurate as of 03/02/01) is available in Europe.
This product contains minute electrically charged particles moving at velocities in excess of five hundred million miles per hour.
Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," it is impossible for the consumer to find out at the same time both precisely where this product is and how fast it is moving.
Not the Beatles.
Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform.
All models over 18 years of age.
Parental guidance suggested.
Caution.
Apply only to affected area.
Not responsible for acts of God.
Nytol may cause drowsiness.
Close cover before striking.
Unless the word inspletularity has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored.
Despite any other listing of product contents found hereon, the consumer is advised that, in actuality, this product consists of at least 99.9999999999% empty space.
For office use only.
Freshest if eaten before date on carton.
May cause drowsiness.
Approved for veterans.
Replace with same type.
Keep cool; process promptly.
Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement.
Do not remove label under penalty of law.
Keep marks inside boxes. Be sure you have marked correctly.
Edited for television.
Some quantum physics theories suggest that when the consumer is not directly observing this product, it may cease to exist or will exist only in a vague and undetermined state.
This product warps space and time in its vicinity.
Read all instructions before starting assembly.
No anchovies unless otherwise specified.
Not recommended for people over the age of 143.
Repeating unconfirmed rumors may have adverse consequences.
Any use of this product, in any manner whatsoever, will increase the amount of disorder in the universe; although no liability is implied herein, the consumer is warned that this process will ultimately lead to the heat death of the Universe.
Many suitcases look alike.
First pull up, then pull down.
Colors may, in time, fade.
Warning.
Subject to change without notice.
Contains a substantial amount of non-tobacco ingredients.
Not to be used in nuclear reactor control systems.
Times are approximate.
Do not attempt to stop chainsaw chain with your hands.
Booths for two or more.
No resemblance to any person, living or dead, is intended.
For off-road use only.
You must be present to win.
Product will be hot after heating.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of Major League Foosball.
Handle With Extreme Care.
As seen on TV.
Penalty for private use.
Warranty period limited.
May cause allergic skin reaction.
Record additional transactions on back of previous stub.
Do not drive car or operate machinery immediately after using Boots Children's Cough Medicine.
Some restrictions apply.
This notice supersedes all previous notices.
Use only as directed.
Public Notice as required by law.
Not responsible for user stupidity.
Keep away from small children.
Do not dispose of in fire.
Do not write below this line.
Lost ticket pays maximum rate.
Original proof of purchase must be returned when applying for a refund.
No purchase necessary.
Not affiliated with the American Red Cross.
Not responsible for typographical errors.
For external use only.
Protected by Smith and Wesson.
Be sure each item is properly endorsed.
Do not carry loose batteries in pockets, purses or bags.
Store it in a cool, dry place.
Disabling security features will increase the chance of data theft or corruption.
Read this before opening package.
Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
Details inside.
For indoor or outdoor use only.
Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop.
No Canadian coins.
Harmful if swallowed.
Contents may settle during shipment.
Never forget 4/20.
See label for sequence.
Thanks to the San Antonio Astronomical Association.
Postage will be paid by addressee.
No COD's.
Shading within a garment may occur.
Not available in stores, call now, operators are standing by.
Bonded items should not be placed in oven, microwave or dishwasher.
Driver does not carry cash.
This product attracts every other piece of matter in the universe, including the products of other manufacturers, with a force proportional to the product of the masses and inversely proportional to the distance between them.
Falling rock.
No animals were harmed during the creation of this Web site.
For use only in the intended use.
The entire physical universe, including this product, may one day collapse back into an infinitesimally small space. Should another universe subsequently re-emerge, the existence of this product in that universe cannot be guaranteed.
Useful results can only be obtained in an inertial frame of reference.
Store in original containers.
In case of irritation, flush eyes with cold water and consult your physician.
Do not disturb.
List each check separately by bank number.
Must be over 17.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse: Omniscience is mandatory in all cases before the court.
Contains substances known by the State of California to cause cancer or birth defects.
Price does not include taxes.
Void where prohibited.
Do not fold, spindle or mutilate.
Some assembly required.
Do not use hair dryer while sleeping.
Special usage rates are also available at select locations.
Contents under pressure; do not puncture or incinerate.
Not for use with aluminum utensils or cookware.
This Web site is intended for the use of the individual members and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs.
Post office will not deliver without postage.
Decision of judges is final.
Sanitized for your protection.
Check here if tax deductible.
Rates higher for users under age 25.
Keep away from fire or flame.
Restaurant package, not for resale.
Shower cap fits one head.
Place stamp here.
Not available in all states.
Use only pencil or blue or black ball point pen.
You could be a winner!
Subject to local regulation.
Some information may be stored in systems not in your country.
This website is not recommended for inmates, ingrates or anyone professing an irrational fear of cats or any other mammal, those who have a penchant for time wasting, illiterates and lawyers.
No user-serviceable parts inside.
Availability is limited.
At participating locations only.
This product is meant for educational purposes only.
No postage necessary if mailed in the United States.
Keep this and all software out of the reach of children.
According to certain suggested versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the primary particles constituting this product may decay to nothingness within the next four hundred million years.
Advisory.
If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.
Subject to availability.
Not to be used for the other use.
Use other side for additional listings.
Unix is a registered trademark of AT&T.
Your mileage may vary.
Thanks to the US Naval Observatory.
No alcohol, dogs or horses.
Do not fold, bend, staple or mutilate.
No solicitors.
Prerecorded for this time zone.
Some equipment shown is optional.
The above limitations may not apply to you.
Do not stamp.
May cause excitability.
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Screens must remain in place to ensure bug free operation.
If condition persists, consult your physician.
Important Notice to Purchasers.
No passes accepted for this engagement.
Avoid contact with skin.
Eating before reading may result in unhealthy indigestion.
Video cameras in use.
Call toll free number before digging.
Full license agreement is included within.
The most fundamental particles in this product are held together by a "gluing" force about which little is currently known and whose adhesive power can therefore not be permanently guaranteed.
Proof of airline or Amtrak arrival is required at ISP counter or higher rates apply.
Reproduction strictly prohibited.
This abridged version does not contain all of the information present in the full text.
Proof of purchase required.
Use with adequate ventilation.
Add toner.
If symptoms persist, consult your physician.
No trees were killed in the creation of this message. However, many electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
Use only in a well-ventilated area.
Drop in any mailbox.
No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop.
Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only.
Safe for children and pets.
Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton.
Do not insert backwards.
Employees and their families are not eligible.
Insure all protective guards are in place before operating machinery.
A 24-hour advance reservation is required.
No other warranty expressed or implied.
Taxes, airport service charges in Europe, fuel, additional mailbox fee, drop charges and other optional items are extra.
Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery.
Cat napping.
Beware of dog.
Slippery when wet.
Read the entire test before answering any questions.
Consumer Notice.
Use inconsistent with package labeling may be a violation of Federal law.
One size fits all.
For weekend rate, page must be accessed after noon Thursday and returned by noon Monday or higher daily rates apply.
Driver carries less than $20 worth of ammunition.
List was current at time of printing.
This conversation may be recorded for training or quality purposes, or just because we feel like we can get away with it.
There is an extremely small but nonzero chance that, through a process know as "tunneling," this product may spontaneously disappear from its present location and reappear at any random place in the universe, including your neighbor's domicile. The manufacturer will not be responsible for any damages or inconvenience that may result.
Do not use hair dryer in the shower.
Not safe for children and pets.
Thanks to the Tech Model Railroad Club.
Do not iron clothes on body.
Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
For recreational use only.
Call toll free before digging.
What goes up, must come down.
Shipping and handling extra.
This is not an offer to sell securities.
Remove baby before folding stroller.
Hearing protection may be required.
Avoid alcoholic beverages while using this software.
Unpredictable results will occur if allowed to pass beyond the event horizon.
Remember to not forget.
Avoid repeated or prolonged contact with skin.
Management assumes no liability for unattended items.
New Grand Unified Theory Disclaimer: The manufacturer may technically be entitled to claim that this product is ten dimensional. However, the consumer is reminded that this confers no legal rights above and beyond those applicable to three-dimensional objects, since the seven new dimensions are "rolled up" into such a small "area" that they cannot be detected.
Not suitable for use at relativistic speeds.
Not to be copied without the expression permission of the National Foosball League.
Optional CDW at $14.99 a day or less is available in the U.S.
Component Equivalency Notice: The subatomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect as those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.
Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant or are nursing are advised to consult their husband and physician before reading this website.
Sales tax not included.
At some off-airport locations, an airport-imposed tax or fee, ranging up to 10% will apply if you choose to exit on our shuttle bus.
Please Note.
This is a 100% matter product: In the unlikely event that this merchandise should contact antimatter in any form, a catastrophic explosion will result.
Health Warning: Care should be taken when lifting this product, since its mass, and thus its weight, is dependent on its velocity relative to the user.
The mass of this product contains the energy equivalent of 85 million tons of TNT per net ounce of weight.
Slightly higher west of the Mississippi.
Batteries not included.
Weekly rates require a 5-day minimum rental or daily rates apply.
Consult your physician before using this program.
The buyer assumes all risks associated with using this product.
Helium balloons may explode when elevated to extreme heights.
Subject to CAB approval.
We have sent the forms which seem right for you.
Kilroy was here.
Simulated picture.
Package sold by weight, not volume.
Failure to respond in a timely manner may result in imposition of additional penalties.
Not a safe alternative to smoking cigarettes.
Use at your own risk.
Misuse may cause personal injury or death.
Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward.
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